It is more natural to plant a seed into one woman and watch her give you what only she could produce. I see her at work daily. But I do think between him and me, it was an emotional connection. Am I jumping the gun here? He recently switched jobs and now he is a flagger i have been really worried lately that he has been maybe messing around with her. I still love him but I cant forgive him. You cant just let someone take advantage of you in that way. when we go out i am normaly the one who holds his hand or tries to be cute with him, i notice when we are out he looks at other woman and then when i ask him about it he says i did not. She told me that that was the way he was and she was upset that he would do something like that to me. I cant find one because I have an iPhone and he has an android. Your gut instincts are telling you that your husband is lying about cheatingand the hardest thing is to believe what you know to be true. Family, few close friends and of course my husband. We had bbqs at each others houses, bonfires, and they went out on our boat with us, 1 time she even brought her kids whom my husband payed a lot of attention too. Now hes decided he wants the marriage to work, but how do I know hes serious? When hes with me, hes distant. You deserve a man who is like you, NORMAL. If I post on his page he either deletes it or ignores it (especially if its something like I love you). He chooses to protect his cohorts and hide the truth, swallowing his lies. Do your trust your husband? Laurie .-= Laurie Pawlik-Kienlens last blog post11 Differences in the Way Husbands and Wives Handle Money =-. He began coming over to comfort me letting me cry which I thought was out of a sincere care due to all the enormous grief I was suffering thru which I foolishly thought was outta kindness!!! lets say, that for what ever reason, he had sex with someone else. Nothing short of traumatic head injury can (should?) nor any guy because of my past that every boyfriend that i hve ever been with has cheated on me. They won't take responsibility for their actions because it makes them feel as though they are out of control and vulnerable. Work is work when he is there and he worked dang hard at his job. Dont trust what he says. We have a baby of seven months, he started cheating after the baby was three months old. The only question now is if you want to remain married to the man who is doing this to you & the kids. Could you call a support line, and talk this through with a counselor? Instead, it might go something like this: you always disappear on our weekends off, you get too chummy and personal with the girls and women at work, you always talk about porn and strip clubs, you say you are the only decent man out there because every other man goes to strip clubs (talk about projection), you oversexualize every woman instead of them just being flakes or incompetent, these other women in your life must be damaged because they have been molested, you talk about your ex-girlfriends, ex-wives or female coworkers all the time, she found naked pictures of women on your phone or computer and you said they were sent by some unwanted entity resulting from an underwear search, you hid something relating to sex from her before you were married and now she cant completely trust you, and the list goes on. They like what they see. Dont bother us with your egotistical, egocentric question of whether you should have an affair with a married man. Be lovey. One emotional affair with a family friend whos like a sister and one very questionable message. I know he is going to the barracks rooms at night but I cant prove anything. Tell someone! He be littles me constantly which is very hurtful. I understand your pain and where I dont have any answers for you, I do have my own story. Thats how I caught u husband cheating on me. Instead, confide in a close family member or friend, as they will be able to help advise you on what you should do in the future. Now it has been almost a year that my husband do not show felings, he doesnt tell me he loves me, we dont do any kind of activity together. Look at how his surrounding and your surrounding is treating you when you are with him. This has caused allot of heat ache for me and emberrasment. I talked to several of the girls he had been with and he told them the same thing your guy did. Im not his mother. Within a couple months I heard rumors of an affair between them so I laughed it off but began to pay closer attention after all my job is an investigator. As I read your comments I think to myself YES! Hes very insightful and honest with me. He admitted she emailed him for the next four weeks and he would answer her back. I am pregnant again, and my husband insists we use condoms. When I had an affair I used intimate words. after a few times she didnt whant to do this anymore. I cheated one weekend in retaliation of a hooker episode 15 years ago, and never did it again. I never really heard him open up about her. Now, I just keep a diary to document his behavior. u said he is drinking probable when he argue with you is becouse he was drunk. If he had nothing to hide, why become defensive, and protective, and secretive? I believe the answer is no, because you said you cant tell him youre thinking of counseling. In a survey of 1,535 adults, a full 91 percent considered infidelity to be morally. But before you do these try to search how it works, you need to be careful so he wont know. Weve also had therapy, and he doesnt seem to take ownership or show empathy for his actions, expecting me to get over it and understand how this being out in the open looks on him. Well she started posting things on her social media about if shes worth anything shes worth anything now, how she wants a movie date and other things which had me feeling like those were directed towards him. I just dont know enough about your relationship or marriage to give you advice! Nov 14, 2016, 12:58 PM EST Jacquie Boyd via Getty Images Asking is the only way to know. Tell him that's it. His untruths are more frequent. Ive been selfish and I feel sorry for this women. Now I am pregnant and I still cant trust and believe him. Ask casual, open-ended questions and prime your partner to tell you the truth when you're ready to get them to admit they are cheating. (anything more than that, will be icing on the cakeGod willing! Plus, it gives you the opportunity to discuss whether you think hes telling you the whole truth and whether or not you should consider staying together. Than took job out of state and he insisted that i go. NARCISSUS I didnt even know what that word meant until I Googled it. my questions are, is he cheating or not? I feel so humiliated and betrayed. It limits me so much. Im done ranting Im not sure how much more I can take we have 4 sons married 27 years. Ive had more issues with him with other women also. Any advice would be appreciated. That will require following him & having definitive evidence to give to him. He is always gone to work weeks at a time out of town or state hes always jealous of other dudes wen he is around and doesnt want me talkin to n e one or n e one lookin at me hes very controling and argumentative and he jus started being this way about 1 year ago. The thing is, this does not happen alot at all or at least maybe I just havent caught him. I dont care anymore, I just want this nightmare to be over, I just want to know he is with her so I finish to convince myself to separate. There is no one right piece of advice, no black and white answer that will solve your problem. This is the point where we start a steady decline. I pray that you are strong and wise in this relationship, and that you follow your heart and gut instincts. Living in the same house , sleeping in separate rooms . I have struggled with my husband for over 15 years. I feel he had sex with her and didnt want me to know so he made the story up. Nope!!! You have to understand how he is wired. Hey anonymous, I have an advice question for you. Get a New job or hobby and he will see you are not thinking about him. Youre picking up on signals and signs, and your gut instincts arent wrong. We have >ow 3 boys together befor my last pregnacy I found another womens number on his account to his phone and called her she said they was just friends. I see a lot of these sites, but I see none of them them say what to do if you dont have the password to their phone!! Its just something Ive observed frequently in many people Ive known. 2) Around that time, I found that he was looking for women on facebook. I dont know if your husband is cheating but I tend to agree with you, that you may be overthinking things. I have more of a life than the time to be following someone that doesnt want to be with me! How to know what love is, on quips and tips for love and relationships. Just because he couldnt stay faithful in your marriage doesnt mean it has anything to do with you. In his car, buy hidden gps tracker in amazon so you will check his location everytime. Usually, the women posting describe behavior from their man that makes its even quite obvious that he is cheating. I found out he had been cheating on me while we were courting and funny enough he never stopped.each time i confronted him ,he came out very defensive and made me feel like i did not know what i was saying. It started as normal as can be. I never had a real true fear that he woukd actually cheat. then when i was pregnant with his child i left an answerphone message on her moby saying not to send x on text i find it offensive ( bareing in mind my fiance knew my ex husband had an affair with a woman at work so i felt fragile . One day I looked at his phone that I pay for and saw a text saying I love you babe and he tried to make it sound like it was one of his kids baby mamas but it wasnt. I thoughT i did everything slow like your supposed to in the beginning. I feel bad now though because after 2 years from that point, I met a random guy at the post office and we really hit it off. hire a private investigator to spy on him and get your proof. Marriage success is build on trust. Definitions of different types of love, for couples and singles. He said a woman at work pulled her pants down in front of him and he thought about itnow when he kisses me or we are intimate it feels different and also wants me to do things a certain way or differentim not sure how i should feelfyi what ever hes wanted to try i was more than willing but all of a sudden im not doing enough.i would love your advice. You do say he takes long drives but he might just need to get away from you if you two are arguing or you are giving him a hard time. We began to go out more often with other friends and her, and we became close friends. He gets so fustrated for everything and talks to me as he dont care anymore. (I regretted trying to overdose on pills and called poison control for help.). He has done a few things different in the bedroom, when I ask him about it he says he is just trying different things as to my reaction. I went through with it anyway. So he wakes up and I told him she called me and he denies being good friends and that he doesnt know her like that, he also denies meeting up at the parking lot, he says he would only go to get gas and cig and leave, that was a lie bc that particular place isnt open at 2am. I wanted to be the 80 year old couple that were madly in love, still holding hands in the nursing home in our wheel chairs. How to Let Go. And ive made a couple more errors since then with other BFs. What is one thing you can do today to start creating that life? I dont get it. Emotional cheating is just as destructive especially when men dont realize theyre doing it.